Sarcastic status is used to show the opposite of what an individual meant. There are several reasons and times we make use of sarcastic statuses, it can be used when someone does something that we are too comfortable with but don’t want them to feel bad by our open reaction. With sarcastic status, we can tell our bad feelings about something in a more polite manner. It is really a good thing to learn how to make use of sarcastic status, because it will help in releasing some forms of tension in the reader of you write up.
Today we are going to share our newest collection of Sarcastic Status, Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcastic Messages, Sarcastic SMS & Best Sarcastic Saying. We hope that you really like below list of status about Sarcastic. Now mostly peoples can easily update their social status with Sarcastic Status after choosing the below one.
Most Awesome Sarcastic Status for Whatsapp – Short Sarcastic Quotes
1.-) If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.
2.-) I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two week.
3.-) Would like to thank all those who ever doubted me you have all made me what i am today. So as a sigh of gratitude you can now kiss my ass.
4.-) My attitude is up to you. If you ignore me, I’ll ignore you, if you give me attitude, I’ll give you attitude, if you screw me over, I’ll f*ck your world up.
5.-) Men are like Pantie hose, some run, some cling and some just don’t fit right in the crotch 😀
6.-) Wants an easier life…I am going to come back as a man!
7.-) ATTENTION LADIES:Recently confirmed medical finding-A penis is usually connected to a real dick. Proceed with caution!
8.-) Why are married women fatter than single women? Single women come home, look in the fridge, then go to bed.Married women look in the bed, then go to the fridge.
9.-) Anyone ever realize the leading cause of divorce is marriage?
- 10.-) I’m not a smart ass, I’m a wise ass! A smart ass can sit on a ice cream cone and tell you what flavor it is, a wise ass can just tell you its going to be cold.
- 11.-) You can’t shake the whore tree and expect an angel to fall out
- 12.-) Has finally discovered what is wrong with the Male brain: On the left side, there is nothing right, and on the right side, there is nothing left!
13.-) Police Scanner just reported a drunk naked idiot wearing snow boots, singing free bird, riding a lawn mower down the highway!Where the F*** R U GOING?
14.-) I saw you talking about me in your status…Cute But next time WHY DON’T YOU TAG ME IN THAT BITCH!
15.-) I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.
16.-) Humour I think the two most ironic things are Dying in a Living room and choking on a Lifesaver!
17.-) I’ve given up the search for reality; now I’m just looking for a good fantasy.
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18.-) You are the type of person that makes me believe the world would have been better off if your mother had swallowed you.
19.-) ( . Y . ) you have now been flashed
20.-) Attention to all men: If I wanted to play games, I’d work in a daycare center.
21.-) Why do men wish that women came with instructions? Like a man would ever read the instructions first anyway!
- 22.-) A democrat is a person who expresses opinions which have nothing to do with his own ones.
- 23.-) Have you heard about the discount for deodorant from Nivea?
- 24.-) One might be led to suspect that there were all sorts of things going on in the Universe which he or she did not thoroughly understand
25.-) There are times when you need to F.O.C.U.S … Fuck Off Cuz Ur Stupid!
26.-) I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
27.-) If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.
28.-) I am sitting here looking at the most amazing person I have ever seen, smart, funny, caring, and absolutely stunning! Yes, I am looking in the mirror!
29.-) I am not bad. I am just dangerously awful.
- 30.-) To the lady with the 6 screaming kids all under the age of 9 at the store: If you’re asking how that box of condoms got in your basket, you’re welcome.
- 31.-) Don’t worry about what people think. They don’t do it very often.
- 32.-) Did it ever occur to you that all the men in the Wizard of Oz are brainless, heartless and cowardly and last but, not least, the Wizard was a liar!?
33.-) I became so religious so that I could pray for you to burn in hell.
34.-) Ever sat down at work and your shooting the shit with your boss when all of a sudden you picture bitch slapping the shit of of them?
35.-) Just keep talking, I yawn when I’m interested.
36.-) Anyone can be an asshole, but I call you ‘Ankles’ because you’re 3 feet below a cunt!
37.-) Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.
38.-) A whore is like a bowling ball. She gets picked up, fingered, thrown in the gutter, then fucking comes back for more.
- 39.-) One day, beyonce called Justin Bieber and asked if he wanted to sing her song at his concert. He asked which one. She laughed and replied, “If i was a boy”.
- 40.-) The BEST part of waking up? Hitting the snooze button and going back to sleep.
- 41.-) When 3 ppl have sex its a threesome, When 2 ppl have sex its a twosome, and now I know why they call you handsome! <3
42.-) Why don’t they have Spring Day. We could decorate with flowers and plants. That would be nicer than red and pink hearts around fat naked babies.
43.-) The only thing to fear is fear itself and what 9 out of 10 doctors would prescribe.
44.-) Is sure that at a certain point, you’re going to need to come to terms with your retardation.
45.-) I’ve heard so much shit I think my ears are constipated!
46.-) Boys I will let you in on a little secret. To keep your woman happy, stop acting like a selfish douche! It’s not rocket science.
47.-) This halo is giving me a headache
48.-) Men are like dogs…always sniffing around for somewhere to bury a bone…lol
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49.-) The best type of men are Snowmen, you build them, dress them, then leave there ass out in the cold!
50.-) I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.
51.-) They lied to us. They said “women mature faster than men” this lead us to the assumption that men would ACTUALLY mature someday
- 52.-) Some men need a slap to get things through their thick skulls, others need a sledge hammer.
- 53.-) I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?
- 54.-) Men always complain about women smothering them. I say if you can hear them complaining you’re not pushing hard enough on the pillow.
55.-) Every time I enter a room, I check to see if my family is getting ready to spring an intervention on me. This is normal, right?
56.-) B*tch at least I still remember planetary motion. The world revolves around the sun.
57.-) Oh… I didn’t tell you…. Then it must be none of your business.
58.-) 3 men sitting in a cafe, all wanking. Waitress: What the fuck are you all doing? One points to the sign that reads: FIRST COME, FIRST SERVED!
59.-) Everyone has heard of Build A Bear Work Shop. Well I want a Build A Man Work Shop! I will take this and this and that and Don’t want that! Would be great!
- 60.-) if Minnie and mickey mouse are older than me then how cum i am taller? x
- 61.-) Kidnapped by a vampire, death by a squid. How tragic
- 62.-) It’s weird, marriage. It’s like this license that gives a person the legal right to control their spouse / their ‘other half.
63.-) Sarcastic Status, Sarcastic Status and quotes
64.-) You don’t have bigger balls than me… mine had to be put on my chest to avoid chafing.
65.-) Trying to understand men is like eating crab legs, a whole lot of work for a little bit of nothing!
66.-) When all else fails, a two by four and duck tape will solve the problem.
67.-) Aren’t you supposed to say that everything is going to be okay?
68.-) If I had a penny for every guy I’ve met that wasn’t a player, I’d probably have like 2 cents.
69.-) I was debating on jumping and ending my despair over losing my best friend, but I decided to call you instead.
- 70.-) Men are like commercials…nothing more than false advertisement.
- 71.-) How much do you charge to haunt a house?
- 72.-) If money’s the god people worship, I’d rather go worship the devil instead.
- 73.-) Man, I sure do hate a bag of air with chips in it.
74.-) IDK why it’s illegal to kill stupid ppl who annoy you!! I say we declare it open season on stupidity and take them all out!
75.-) Don’t waste yer’ breath kid. Explainin’ anything to that one? It’s like tryin’ ta’ slap the dumb off a retard. George Foster
76.-) Nobody should have to die to a crappy soundtrack
77.-) Better put a condom on honey, ’cause if you’re gonna act like a d!ck, you should dress like one.
78.-) I love to hear you talk- the white noise is very relaxing.
79.-) If you’ve never met the devil in the road of life, its because you’re both heading in the same direction.
80.-) No matter how good a person speaks, when he talks too much, ultimately he will speak stupid things
81.-) Zombies eat brains. You’re safe.
82.-) There is a fine line between fashion and circus. So where’s the tent.
83.-) A fuck must be earned. I can’t go down the street with a bucket of fucks, giving them out to everyone. If I feel that you’ve earned it, I will give a fuck.
- 84.-) Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one else does.
- 85.-) Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids
- 86.-) Is damn near positive that real men are fictional creatures like unicorns and fairies…
- 87.-) I think the two most ironic things are Dying in a Living room and choking on a Lifesaver!
88.-) Are you fighting evil tonight?…Then you are doing the Lord’s work. Shut the fuck up.
89.-) As long as you have a strong back and take a lot of crap the end result will be used up…
90.-) I don’t believe in plastic surgery, But in your case, Go ahead.
91.-) Violence won’t solve anything…But it sure makes me feel good.
92.-) Guys have no idea how long the stupid shit they say sticks in a woman’s mind.
93.-) Basic law of estrogen: We’re right, you’re wrong. Shut up!
94.-) Says since when did my “day off” become “the day to do housework”? I’d rather get paid.
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95.-) Christians rejected the need for proof to support belief in God, yet dismissed proof altogether when it was there.
96.-) How very observant of you there captain obvious.
- 97.-) I appreciate thieves who do their research, but at least you recognize worth when you see it.
- 98.-) I love parents’ way of saying you have got a point “Don’t talk back at me!!”
- 99.-) I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and don’t want to see your ugly mug every day.
- 100.-) You can always tell how much someone wants something by the amount of effort they put into it…
- 101.-) Your life is not my fault…my life is not your business
102.-) Stop acting like God’s gift to women… The gift was the Orgasm, You’re just the messenger boy…
103.-) Women worry about the things that men forget. Men worry about the things women remember.
104.-) Ok look man, you clearly are not hard up for money, you’re driving a range rover, so call whoever has your jaguar or benz and ask them to help you out. I got things to do.
105.-) I will become a fan of the Procrastinators Club… tomorrow. I promise…
106.-) Women, now we know who to really blame: MENtal illness MENstrual cramps MENtal breakdown MENopause GUYnecologist HISterectomy
107.-) Useless info for today ~ the female praying mantis bites the head off the male after mating ~ hmmm maybe not so useless after all lol
108.-) Peace pot tequila shot Jesus loves you stoned or not sex drugs rock n roll speed weed birth control life’s a bitch then you die fuck the world lets get high <3
109.-) Thinks most men are like public toilets.Their either Occupied, Dirty, Broken, Stinky, Falling down, being fixed, never stocked, busy, But, mostly full of shit..
110.-) That is the ugliest top Ive ever seen, yet it compliments your face perfectly.
111.-) Miracles happen every day. I haven’t choked the stupid out of someone today. See? Miracle
112.-) Is heading off to club B.E.D featuring DJ pillow and Mcblanket, going to show my sheets some ass and give me blanket some head.